Darwin Knew Best

When my childhood dreams of working with National Geographic or joining the crew on one of Greenpeace's ships didn't amount to anything, I wondered if I will ever truly make use of my biology degree, which I had pursued out of passion.

I mean don't get me wrong, as noble and dignified (um, actually scratch the latter) as it is to be chasing 9-year-olds with an attention span that would make a gold fish look really good, I find myself yearning from time to time to do something really biology-ish (how scientific does this sound, eh?:P). And I don't mean anything to do with microscopes cuz- this is a little confession- I never quite figured out how the heck those things work, and even when I accidentally worked one correctly, I would always wonder why oh why would anyone care or want to see something that's this tiny- know what I'm saying? Microorganisms are boring, I like big fat lively animals! (yeah yeah I'm a disgrace to biologists, big deal).

Then there's the fact that the elementary science I currently teach is naturally very basic and simple, which has me worrying I may soon forget most of what I've learnt. I mean, it's not like it was a breeze getting my degree people. I have had to suffer through world-class-boredom-inducer professors, and lab sessions that knew no end. I even had to watch some cute little white mice get killed in acts of cold blooded murder. I am also guilty of finishing off a whole family of fruit flies- bless their souls poor things- after forgetting them inside my locker; then having to make up the results of my lab report (yes yes we have already established that I'm a disgrace:P)

So you can imagine my thrill today when I was finally able to apply some of my knowledge!

Inspired from Darwin's Evolution and Natural selection, I present:



Evolution of An Elementary All-Boy Class Teacher:

Stated simply and concisely: In an all-boy elementary classroom with no evidence of student discipline, either uninterested and unconcerned or overbearing and obnoxious parents, and a administration that is too keen to keep parents happy to to do something about it , survival is for the meanest, scariest and most terrifying teacher.

Which means that a successful teacher must gradually evolve into this:


Therefore, as a last resort and in a desperate attempt at self and sanity preservation, I must find a way to hasten my adaptation, and somehow look like the above example. Fast.

Just for the next three months. Then I'll be all smiley again, I promise.

(Darwin didn't happen to mention whether it's a reversible process or not, now did he?:P)