You can tell it's a memorable experience when...

More than 2 years later, a lot of my conversations still begin with: "Oh that reminds me of that time in Sabila when we....."

If you think about it, it's not surprising. I mean, where else in a span of a month would I have:

washed dishes for a 30 person meal!

Climbed down, got my rope tangled and was rescued

up a 100-foot tower (and I'm scared of heights!! REAL scared.)

Helped build our own camp fire, and spent many cold nights cozily around it:)

Met the local kids...

pretended like I knew how to paint!

Enjoyed an "all-the-grapes-you-can-eat" festival!







Conquered Rum On Foot...




and its highest peak "Om Al Dami"

Collapsed on the floor, not giving my "cleanliness" a second thought!

washed cars using a dust sweeper...

Sailed on board of a ship

was a proud member of "hideously striped red tshirt" gang:)

Somehow found myself looking like this---->

Explored the world around us (or was it our own feet??:P)

Experienced Jordan. The real thing.

I'm in such a nostalgic and reminiscing mood tonight.. but I guess you figured that already!

Ouch

I guess- ouch- it takes a session of wall climbing to make one -ouch- appreciate how many muscles are -ouch- actually involved in the simple process of typing. Ouch.

I finally had a chance to check the wall climbing they have here yesterday with Nadine and her friend's two little girls. I thought it was cool, so I went today and climbed for an hour.

Ouch.

Ouch.

Ouch.

My fingers, wrists and arms have gone into permanent spasm! I have lost all sensation in that area. Mom and dad sat sipping their coffee as they watched me flail my arms while my body swung and dropped to the ground- over and over. The amused looks on their faces were unmistakable. The sound effects I produced, however, were lost on them, since they were sitting indoors.

Aside from the fact that my climbing skills are crummy still, it's really AWESOME (ouch- and yes it hurts more to write capitalized for some reason :P)

But one thing's for sure, this aint over Mr. Wall!! I'll be back with vengeance- flailing arms and all :P

This girl is no quitter (but she is a whiner and OUCH this hurts)

Keeps gettin better and better!

I believe I had made my rejoice apparent earlier when I mentioned my plans to go to Amman during my mid-term holiday (which is in a week!! YAY TO ME:D). Just the thought of being there, amidst all the familiar things is enough to draw a huge silly grin on my face.. My bed, our kitchen, our beat-up (but surviving strong!) car, my friends, my cat, everything!
You get the point.

My dad then decided to make his trip to Amman coincide with mine, so that meant I had a travelling buddy! Which only made the appealing nature of my travels even more so:)

Another great surprise was finding out that dear ol' cousin Nasser will be (after 10 years of absence) visiting this end of the universe too! A fellow choco/cookie/dessert-oholic visiting town, juuuuust the excuse I need to make sure I visit each and EVERY desserty place :P Looking good. Looking good indeed :D

and NOW just like that, out of the blue, my sis informs me that she made reservations and she'll be around in Amman same time!!!!!!!!!!! (It's actually still sinking in. I mean I thought I won't see her till the summer!! and now IN A WEEK. wow)

People people slow down, there's only so much excitement and happiness I could handle!
I think I'm hyperventilating here :D (seriously)

That is SO AWESOME.
Fatherly/daughterly/sisterly/cousinly reunion squashed into one! Lookin good lookin good;)

Oh and don't make the mistake of thinking that I won't see my brother! He also surprised us with the news of him coming (to Kuwait) during his spring break, which is in like a month from now! :D :D so that's also another thing to GET SOOOOO EXCITED AND ECSTATIC ABOUT. Man, all this happiness is exhausting I must say :D

So to those of you involved in this Ammani reunion, here's what I propose our plans MUST include:

1. For rainy days: cookie baking, cookie eating, cookie hugging (did I say that out loud?:P) . Mac and cheese nights while watching a corny feel-good-happy-ending chick flick (I can almost see your grimace Nasser)
2. For rainy days (option 2): just go for a loooong walk and get totally soaked (hmm.. i have a hunch I'll end up doing that one alone:)
3. Hikes and outdoorsy stuff: Ajlun reserve, Rum? and/or Wadi Ibin Hammad (don't worry Dalia I'll do the driving, you just sit back, relax, and say your last prayers!)
4. laid back walk through Shmeisani all the way to Plaza, get pizza and an action/thriller/too-much-violence-it-makes-me-want-to-cry movie to cater for the taste of our Y-chromosome-carrying family members (how considerate am I, eh?).
5. A visit to Chez Hilda, indulging in her desserts, and thanking her for making the world a sweeter place!
6. Pizza Nutella at Caserreccio (repeat as necessary).
7. A visit to Darat al Funun followed by a walking tour downtown (with Dalia as a guide, cuz let's face it I'm clueless most of the time!), buying 1 dinar sunglasses and making sure dad gets his Habiba syrup-laden Kunafa!:)
8. Visit the crazy cat! and marvel on how fat he's gotten.
9. Play Taboo and actually get an answer right (I'm talking about myself here).
10. Go for a run every morning in Sport City's cute woodsy path! (again, the likelihood of getting someone to tag along is slim-to-none).
11. A picnic on the side of the aiport road or on the patch of grass on the 2nd or 3rd circle (HEHEHEHEHEHEHE kidding!! Although that would be a TRULY Ammani thing to do. Man I miss Amman.)
12. An all-the-shawerma-and-falafel-you-can-eat-in-one-day tour, for the shawerma/falafel-deprived Canadian souls:P
13. Catching up on ALL the new local jokes. I've been in Kuwait for a year and a half now and no one has EVER told me a joke. I miss the humor! I used to always have a joke up my sleeve, now I'm rusty.
14. Buying a huge pack of sha3rawi, cuz let's face it it's the yummiest gum ever (and that's from someone who almost never chews gum).
15. Basically savoring the Ammani experience :D

Huh. Is it just me or do half these points revolve around food? We must seriously get a life!!

As for you my brother, our sisterly/brotherly/motherly/fatherly plans will be disclosed as the time comes nearer :D me loves you!

And as if I didn't have enough to rejoice in already, we have a long weekend this week! Yay to me! :D

Lovin my Cuppa

I don't come from a family of die-hard tea lovers (mom's a Turkish coffee person and dad's an American coffee dude). Actually, you would rarely see tea on the table at our house unless we have people over.
On the other hand, Ammanis are known for their love for tea. But during my four years of college, it didn't quite rub off on me. As a college student you don't really do a lot of visiting! And the occasional cup of tea here or there wasn't enough to make a lasting impression. Oh and it certainly didn't help that as a roomie I had a sis who thinks hot liquids in cups/mugs are only supposed to be used as hand warmers!!

However, now that I'm away from Amman for the most part of the year, the times when I am there involve a lot of home visits. And visiting homes in Amman can only mean one thing: Tea on the table. And I must say, over the past summer, it has grown on me.

It was a gradual process. First I started to expect it, then I started to enjoy it, then actually look forward to it. At the end, now brace yourself, I actually decided to invest in a box of Lipton tea! So for the first time in the history of my Odd-hours-shopping-at-plaza, tea made it on my list!

How hard can it be right? It's just tea. Oh and I even know which brand I want, easy-peasy. I scanned the shelves for the word "Lipton"- oh here it is. Oh here's another. wait, that's also lipton. What the..???
Yellow Label. Earl Grey. Green tea. Purple Tea. God knows what else! I was lost. I just wanted tea. The normal brown thing people gave me at their homes.

A friend in need is a friend indeed! At the end I called up my friend, who works in a lab. In the background around her I could hear stuff like: "is the culture ready?" "Quick quick the patient is here" "WHERE IS THE TEST TUBE", but that didn't faze me. She actually listened to me freak out about what tea brand to buy and didn't even hang up, now THAT is a test of a true friend! (sure, she later called me back and called me nuts and crazy, but that's besides the point).

These days, I'm more of a green tea with honey person. I love it. And now that I've come across those articles on BBC on how great tea is (black, green, all's good!), this newbie tea-lover won't be going anywhere;)

Lets bet our falafel on it!

Thanks to YouTube, I was able to watch the new Canadian sitcom "Little Mosque On the Prairie", and so can you.

All I can say is, WOW. It's brilliant. It's fantastic. It's JUST what we need! Zarqa Nawaz (the show creator), you rock!
I'm more than looking forward to catching the upcoming episodes. I absolutely loved the characters (and no, not just the good-looking 20-something Imam:P). Sarah with her cucumber sandwishes (Ewww) and don't-piss-me-off Fatima. But my favorite has to be the old Imam. Oh my God he is hilarious. "The enemy is IN YOUR KITCHEN". Priceless I tell you.

Be sure to watch it, you'll love it. I'll "bet my falafel" on that;)

Phew

Hamad: Teacher where would we find the negative and positive charges inside us?

Me: Okay see, you are really made out of billions of veeeeeeeery tiny things called "atoms" and inside those extreeeeemely tiny atoms you'll find the charges.

Hamad: I'm made of atoms?

Me: Yes Hamad lots and lots of them. You're FULL of atoms.

Hamad (visibly horrified): ONLY ME TEACHER?

Me (cracked up): no of course not! So am I!
Hamad: And Ahmed?
Me: yes and ahmed.
Hamad: And Khaled and Saod and Abdulla???
Me: Yes EVERYONE and EVERYTHING.

Hamad (able to breathe again): Oh okay.

Boyish Spat

Mohammed: You're a girl!
Khaled: No, YOU are a girl.
Mohammed: No YOU are.

Me (mumbling to myself): I WISH.

Leave it to Dr. Seuss

Growing up, Friday prayers have always been associated with the men in our family. My dad took my brother. Or all my cousins would go with my grandpa. I was never really involved in them. The only thing I did (with the help of my sis) was ask my little brother as soon as he's home what the sermon was about. He always gave us the same blank look- which we took as a sign that he had dozed off during it, and enjoyed teasing him for hours!

So when I visited Boston a few months back, and my sis told me to get ready for Friday prayer at MIT's musalla, my first reaction was: "Huh? Why?". I did end up going eventually, and boy am I glad I did. Apparently, Friday prayer is like a weekly mini-reunion, where you get to meet all the "sisters" and "brothers" whom you wouldn't otherwise see what with the hectic college life. As we found ourselves a comfortable corner to snuggle in, I watched as the small musalla room filled up to its full capacity. Then the sermon began. It was amazing. It was short and concise, yet its effect was great. All the while you could tell that the Imam had a message to send and he was doing just that. It was delivered so eloquently and in a manner that is unassuming and easy to relate to. He wanted each and every one of us to leave and remember that message, as we walked or cycled or road the subway home. I left feeling cleansed, serene and with something to think about.

I thought to myself "hmm.. that's nice. How come I don't go to Friday prayers back home? I really should".
And that's how I ended up in the Grand Mosque a couple of weeks ago. I sat in the spacious room, alongside the other ladies. Some were reading Qoran, some were greeting each other, and others were attending to their infants or toddlers, fruitlessly trying to shush them (oh but that's a can of worms on its own). Soon the call for prayer announced the beginning of the sermon.

I really don't know where to start. No seriously, I'm in shock. I don't know what to make of it.
But there I was; a twenty-something and fairly-intelligent (I like to think) girl listening to a respected Shaykh and yet feeling incredibly stupid and thick. I mean it was unbelievable. I understood each and every word he said on its own, but as a whole unit, his sentences made no sense to me. To further help you understand how I felt, imagine an Arab attempting to read an Urdu text. Even though he's able to recognize each and every letter seperately, it does nothing to aid him in making sense of the foreign blends that are in fact Urdu words.

The Imam seemed to have put all his energy into ornamenting his sentences, delivering easy on the ear and quite enjoyable rhyming words, with a nice ring to them. It had an artistic outer shell that might elicit initial admiration, and yet sooner or later the shocking reality of it's hollow body will look you straight in the eye.
Try as I might to pinpoint the message behind his multitude of words, I could not. I tried, honestly and heartily, to figure out where he's heading with this, but to no avail. I was literally forcing myself to concentrate, but eventually had no choice but to give up and totally zone out. Just then I remembered my (back then) 8-year-old brother. If the sermons he used to attend were anything like this one, I pitty the poor kid.

My initial shock and anger didn't last long, and as I left the breathtakingly designed Grand Mosque, only sadness was left in my heart. How could this be happening? Since when did Imams become more concerned with the musical effect their sermons possess, than with their actual content.
And what's even worse is that it's not like we are in no need for those sermons. In fact, I don't think our need for guidance has ever been greater. Has the Imam not seen the state of us? The state of our countries? Does he not see the lying, the cheating, the stealing that takes place all the time. Did he not hear about the reckless teenagers that roam the streets like maniacs with their daddy-bought-it-for-me convertables and end up killing not only themselves but an entire unsuspecting family? Doesn't he have anything to say to that employee who wastes hour upon hour in his job and ditches work whenever he wants and gets a fake sick leave. What about the doctor who actually gives fake sick leaves in return for immediate gain? Does the Imam choose to ignore our gossip and back-biting-infested societies? Does he not feel the need to reassure that repenting sinner that God is all merciful and forgiving? It's always good when someone reminds us of that... Why doesn't he notice and talk to the young boys between the crowds? Why not make them feel noticed and not overshadowed by grownups they accompany for a change. Does the Imam not hear the news? Does he not sip his coffee over the morning paper? Does he really think our state of things is so ideal that he can afford the leisure of entertaining our senses with artistic and almost poetic sermons that are devoid of any meaning?

Don't get me wrong. I do realise that this was one Imam, one Friday, in one mosque at one tiny corner in the world. I'm sure there are billions of amazing people, muslims and non-muslims alike, who are doing their part of making this world a better place. Just now as I type this, I can overhear the Friday sermon coming from the direction of the mosque near us. I wasn't really following it word for word, but there seems to be a theme. Which is good.

I don't want to fall into the pit of only highlighting the negative and turning a blind eye on the positive. I mean, just the fact that there are people like Shaykh Hamza Yusuf still around us, is reason enough to keep the hope very much alive.

And so I remain hopeful.

hmmm...

Excerpt from a convo over lunch..

Mom: Mariam habibti, you do know that "a6iggak 6rag" means slap you on the face, right?
Me: What? Of course not, "a6iggak" means beat you up and "6rag" is just added for emphasis and exaggeration.
Mom: really? And who told you this?
Me: Um, no one. I just know.
Mom: Interesting, but nonetheless totally off.
Me: Are you SERIOUS?
Mom: Next time make sure you run any Kuwaiti you "understand" and use by me first. Especially if you're gonna blog it for everyone to see :P
Me: BUT.. fine. okay.

Hmm... That explains a lot. No seriously, A LOT.

Bilingual- Gone Bad!

I guess, to me, being bilingual means possessing proper command of two languages (in my case Arabic and English). While I am equally comfortable using either, I would slightly favor one over the other depending on the area. For example, Arabic will always be my mother tongue; the language I grew up hearing and speaking. No matter how fluent or comfortable I’ll get in English or any other language for that matter, I would always want and miss using the purely Arabic colloquial expressions. They are so expressive, and yet are lost in translation.
When it comes to the read and written language however (again, I can do both perfectly well) the scale tips in favor of English. I guess it’s just a matter of getting used to it.

My feeble attempts to be trilingual have obviously amounted to nothing. The French classes at school were a big bucket of time wasted. Then there was that “Italian For Beginners” course I took during my last summer in college. Well, originally I was going for Spanish. You see, I thought it would be wise to learn a phrase or two if I were to marry Enrique Iglesias! (Which was the plan at the time:P) But Spanish wasn’t available in the summer, but my friends told me Italian is close, and would be good enough. Huh.

My school where I work now is bilingual. However, the kids are redefining what “Bilingual” means to me. Bilingual is what produces sentences like these:

Hammad: NO TEACHER WALLAH he khatterni (cut in front of me)!
(Said after being told off for pushing his friend in line)

Abdulaziz: Miss Mariam can I go to the bathroom? Pleeeeeeeeeeease pleeeeeease 7addi 7addi 7asran! (Can’t hold it any longer).
(Said with a cringe that gets me all panicked and hurriedly yelling: “GO GO GO”)

Ahmad: Teacher see Barak! He hit me biryoola (with his legs)
(Said as Barak looks at me ever-so-innocently!)

Each and Every boy: Just wait I will a6iggak 6rag (beat you silly) in recess.
(Said, well, pretty much all the time. Unless he decides to proceed with the “6rag” right away, in which case this very thoughtful forewarning would seize to exist).


It’s really quite impressive how they fluently and automatically mesh the two languages into this unrecognizable awful hybrid!
It used to confuse the hell out of me at first. Now not only do I expect it, but my brain has gotten so used to this instant language hopping, that when they do happen to say a complete sentence in English or Arabic, my automatic response is “come again?”.

"Nothing comes from nothing...."

"Nothing ever could..
So somewhere in my youth or childhood,
I must've done something good..."

to have a class as amazing as 4C..

And I must've done something postively wicked to get one like 4D.

And for that I'm really sorry. Did you hear that? So sincerely, completely and utterly sorry.

Make it stop.
Please?

And the celebrations begin!

Not really. I'm spending the day preparing lesson plans, for tomorrow we go back to school *sniff sniff*

Last night though (the night of my birthday) my mom and dad took me out for dinner. I was told to choose any place I like. I had no clue at first, the multitude of dining options around here is overwhelming!
Then I suddenly remembered seeing the ad of and spotting this fairly new restaurant called Thai Chi, which is as you prolly figured out both a Thai and Chinese restaurant squashed into one.

Some years back when on a holiday in Malaysia I did swear off Thai food after a very very unpleasant mouthful-of-hot-red-chili encounter (don't even ask!). But while at Boston a few months back, my sis took me to a real nice Thai restaurant and my relationship with Thai Cuisine was thus reconciled.

The minute we stepped in the place I was in love. Seriously, I didn't give a stinky sock whether the food would be good or not, I was SO coming back to this place! The design won me over while still at the doorstep. It's on two levels and contemporary is the design theme. The whole place is a warm deep blend of crimsons and yellows with big glass windows. Every little detail is well thought out and absolutely gorgeous. I loved the chairs, plates, the vase and the delicate crimson flower inside, the staircase, the mesmerising oriental kimonos of the waitresses and the lighting. The atmosphere was so cosy and welcoming. Oh and it so happened that I was dressed in crimson myself, so I totally blended in;)

The food did not disappoint at all. Everything was served in a cute plate and the taste had me instantly tuck in with relish! AND the waitress actually pointed out the red chili in my plate with an uncomfortably (to me!) knowing look (hmmm, I guess I prolly have the look of a girl who naively mistakes red chili pepper for red cabbage and eats a mouthful!!:P)

It was the closest thing to a perfect evening- except I so wished Dalia and Abood would be there as well. Abood called to wish me a happy birthday during dinner and I got the chance to rave about the place, so I kinda felt he was around!:)
Sis, this is the first place we're going to next time you're in town. You'll love it.

To those of you living in Kuwait, what are you waiting for, go Thai Chi!

10..9...8..7...6...

5....4.....3.....2.....1.... Aaaaand...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to... me!
:D

Three And Twenty

The good thing about having my birthday (hint hint) so close to New Year's, is that I only need to go into a deep reflective mode once a year! Which is more than enough for me really.

And to be fair to both occasions (my birthday is on the 5th), this usually happens somewhere in between. And since today is the 3rd, what better timing, no?

I'll be turning 23! I won't lie to you, I wasn't thrilled at first. I don't really like odd numbers (the exception being 21- I loved being 21! It felt so important). I'd rather be 24 than 23. Or I could stay 22, I loved being 22! I'm going to miss being 22:) Oh well, life goes on. (See I'm already halfway into this "wise pondering mode", must say I'm proud of meself:P

So in the spirit of embracing being 23, this post's theme will be... you guessed it, TWENTY THREE!
Brace yourselves. Oh and don't expect this to be deep (I'm too drowsy and high on sugar to know what the heck I'm writing).

23 Things I'm Thankful For:

1. Chocolates.
2. Godiva Chocolate.
3. A nutella Jar of spreadable bliss!
4. Any Chocolate, really.
5. Yep, even semi-sweet baking chocolate.
6. Anything with sufficient sugar to guarantee a sugar rush effect, really.
7. My pillow. Try sleeping without one and you'll know what I'm talking about.
8. Kids. The world would be such a serious, dull and unlivable place without them.
9. Smiles. Best thing in the world, no competition.
10. Liquid soap.
11. Snuggle socks. My toes would fall off without them (not good).
12. Water- especially after a long run.
13. Being able to run.
14. My ugly runners (hey they do the job pretty darn well- but yeah they're awfully ugly I dunno what I was thinking when I bought them.)
15. Msn, emails, this blog, whatever keeps me connected to my dearest loved ones!
16. My dearest loved ones.
17. My dearest loved ones.
18. My dearest loved ones. (can't say that enough)
19. Laughter. Hard and often.
20. Pajamas. The cute kiddish ones. Man I would love to live in my Pajamas- day and night!
21. Friends (the comedy). Oh alright, and the real ones as well;P
22. Great people like Hamza Yusuf and Amr Khaled.
23. The million stars (in Wadi Rum). We don't look up at the sky often enough. We should.

My Far-Fetched Wish List (23 items):

1. Have chocolate scratched off the "Things that could seriously shorten your life span and cause sudden painful death" list.
2. Learn to play an instrument (guitar or piano...).
3. Backpack through Europe, Amazon, Africa and India.
4. Learn another language fluently.
5. Be a professional athlete.
6. Win an Olympic Gold medal.
7. Work with Greenpeace.
8. Work as a wild life photographer for National Geographic.
9. Open my own school.
10. Have my owns kids to experiment with and eventually mess up, but nonetheless love them to death.
11. Don't worry, I do realise I must find their dad first. That would be item 11:P
12. Live in Jerusalem.
13. Write a bestseller (even if it's cause I bought and scared my friends into buying 999, 000 of the million copies sold;)
14. Read an encyclopedia from cover to cover and actually REMEMBER stuff.
15. Have a better memory. (I'm sorry, do I know you? My brother? for real?)
16. Becoming one of those AWESOME teachers who know their stuff.
17. Become a character in Harry Potter series.
18. Somehow stopping people from being SUCH DISGUSTING LITTER BUGS. Honestly.
19. Getting my black belt in Ju-Jitsu and being as dangerously awesome as Sensei Nadine is.
20. Learning to say no to drugs. (HEHEHEHE I'm kidding mom don't freak out!)
21. See an end to wars, poverty and abuse.
22. Memorize the Qoran.
23. Never ever be away from or lose someone I love.

23 things I resolve never to do- not in a million years (so help me God!)

1. Wear heels.
2. Eat chips or processed meat.
3. Put on Makeup.
4. Wear animal prints.
5. Live in the Gulf (Huh. So much for that resolution!)
6. Backbite.
7. Take more than 10-15 minutes to get ready (unless it's for a fancy event)
8. Forget my friends' birthdays.
9. Watch a soap opera, reality TV or talk show (well, for more than 10 seconds anyway).
10. Visit a dentist- viscious people I tell you.
11. Being sucked into the materialistic life around here.
12. Forget Amman. The things I love about it.
13. Complain more than once a day.
14. Make snap judgements, especially about people.
15. Think I'm all that.
16. Throw one of the kids in my classroom out of the window.
17. Smoke or be around people who do.
18. Upset my parents.
19. Outgrowing a day at the playground.
20. Wallow in my misfortune rather than celebrate my blessings.
21. Drink turkish coffee.
22. Swear off chocolates.
23. Stop loving my big fat crazy cat.

Man, this post woulda been so much easier to write if I were turning 4!

هيو ميييين؟؟؟

مقطع من شريط الأخبار المعروض على أسفل الشاشه

هيومان رايتس ووتش: محاكمة صدام شابتها عيوب جسيمه

مريم: بابا مين هوه هيومان رايتس هاد؟ و مين وتش؟

بابا: والله يا بابا ما انا عارف مين حطك إتربي أجيال

بكره العيد و بنعيد.. بندبح بقره السيد

I believe it was my grandpa who first taught me and my cousins this song. If I close my eyes for a bit, memories of many happy Eids in Amman will effortlessly surface.. I can almost hear us singing this song, giggling in amusement. I can still feel both my sister and my horror as we reached the "بندبح بنت العم" part (which is understandable since back then, were were the only "banat 3am" around!!).

I remember snuggling in the car together, trying to keep up with our grandma as she repeated the "Takbeer" all the way to the Eid prayer, but only succeeding in cutting her trail of thoughts, over and over. I remember her warm smile and glowing face..

I remember rushing to kiss all the grown-ups with a "kol saneh ou inta salem" and a look that plainly says "where's my 3eediyyeh?" :)

I remember my excitement as I basked in my newfound fortune. This lasted only as long as it took us to reach the toy shop. Fireworks, slimey icky balls, funny tricks and dolls- with such abundant tempatation, it's hardly a mystery our pockets are always empty on our way out.

Oh and changing into my new outfit! What excitement. I remember wanting to put it on days before the Eid, each day opening my closet to check that it's still there and still as pretty as I remember it to be.

Wow. It's been such a long time since I actually went and bought an "Eid outfit", specifically. But that's hardly the part of Eid I miss (afterall I am in the "land of a thousand malls", buying a new outfit is the least of my worries). What I do miss, terribly and painfully, is the spirit of Eid. When the whole family gets together, when the "kol saneh ou inta salem" is delivered not by phone, ecards and messages, but face to face. When the smile is true and touchable, not a mere ":)" in a window.

Seedo, I miss you to bits. I miss your laugh as you hear us singing the Eid songs. Tata, I wish that your angelic smile is the first thing I see on Eid. Sis, it's not Eid without you on the next bed as mom tries to wake us up for the 100th time for Eid prayer. Bro, something seems wrong when you're not around to "strike a deal" with me (aka stealing my 3eediyyeh you git:P). Auntie Sausan, my favorite auntie, nothing is the same without you. You add warmth, bliss and vigor just by being there. 3amo Munzer, there isn't a person in the world who's sweeter, and who makes me feel more special and loved. Auntie Basma, you always add a little something special. Amo Izzat, thank you for being so nice and sweet to me always.
My dear awesome cousins...
Nasser: Certainly is less competition on "Ka3ek" without you around;P But it's no fun that way. No fun at all!
Bisher: What's eid without your cute mischief?:)
Hussam: Who else will lead our kitten rescue expeditions?:)
Bassel: Who will make me laugh on Eid like you do?
Yassmeena: Sure feels good to know Dalia and I are no longer the only girls that qualify as "بنت العم" ;) I love acting silly with you:)

Mom and Dad.. it means the world to me that I'm lucky enough to be around you on Eid:) Without you, it wouldn't even be Eid.

Hmmm, considering that only 3 of the aforementioned will probably read this post, I'm not sure I should be pouring my heart out like that. Oh well, too late for that now! Blame this excessive mushiness on Eid, not me:)

Happy Eid to you all.. My awesome family.. wherever you are!
That's what I'm thankful for on this Eid, on this New Year, and on every passing day. If I were to handpick my family, I wouldn't possibly be able to choose a more awesome, loving and amazing family than you guys. You rock my world!

And to quote the movie "What a Girl Wants" that I'm watching right now: I love you a million red m&m's:)

My family. That's what this girl wants...

Sense and sense ability

That's the title (love the name!) of yet another interesting article I read on BBC today.

It speaks of our sense of smell, in particular it addresses the issue of people who have lost their sense of smell.

Now that I think about it, of all our other senses, our sense of smell receives the least spotlight. I mean, the few times during our childhood when electricity was cut off and we stumbled our way to get the candles ensured we appreciate the blessing of eyesight. We can't imagine a world without the sounds and see firsthand (in the case of aging relatives) how loss of hearing can make a person's life (and people around them) annoyingly inconvenient. And we wouldn't trade our sense of touch for the world....
Yet rarely do we stop to appreciate our sense of smell. We completely take it for granted, we don't pause, ponder or show gratitude and thankfulness.

As a matter of fact, after reading the article, I'm convinced we don't even realise its true impact on our lives. I guess it's one of those things you don't appreciate till you lose. Which is a shame really.

Can you imagine your life without the sense of smell?
I won't even touch upon the dangers associated with such a loss (not being able to smell leaking gas? Fire?). Instead, lets focus on the things that give our life that extra spice and flavor. Things we'll miss out on.

Can you imagine getting a gorgeous bouquet of flowers and not being able to take a whiff of their freshness? Not being able to smell that fresh batch of cookies?
Keeping in mind that smell and taste are interlinked, can you imagine having all food taste the exact same: bland and tasteless. Broccoli or chocolate pudding- would it really make a difference? How many times did a subtle smell send you reminiscing about old times long gone?

One of the things I love most about my home in Amman, is how I'm greeted by the intoxicating yet gentle scent of Jasmine growing over our gate. I can't imagine stepping in and not feeling that..
I have vivid childhood memories of my grandma going out to the garden each morning to pick the not yet open Jasmine buds, to put on a small plate with a few droplets of water and leave it by her bedside. Later they would open and give her room a permanent aroma that makes you feel you're in a garden. I miss that smell.

Right after I read the article I started noticing how much we unconsciously refer to smells in our daily conversations.
"mmmm, something smells so good".
"What's that smell?"
"Open the windows or the whole house will smell like frying oil".
"Wow.. did you smell her perfume?"

I, myself, rely heavily on my sense of smell when presented with new kinds of food. I'm very finicky when it comes to trying out something I don't know. So I shamelessly (completely deaf to my mom's scandalized look as she tells me it's rude to do so) sniff it out and accordingly decide if it's a yay or a nay.

So next time people tell you to wake up and smell the coffee, go ahead and do that. And while you're at it, stop and smell the roses. But most importantly, savor the experience, and be thankful that you can. Be very thankful.

So... what are your favorite scents?

Who knew?

I came across this interesting page on BBC, called "100 things we didn't know last year". Here are my favorites (plus my say on them;) :

1. Fathers tend to determine the height of their child, mothers their weight.
Why am I not surprised?
2. The Pope's been known to wear red prada shoes.
I knew he was weird- I knew it!!!!!
3.More than one in eight people in the united states show signs of addiction to the internet, says a study.
4. The brain is soft and gelatinous- its consistency is something between jelly and cooked pasta.
Very "scientific" analogy I must say!
5. Barbie's full name is Barbie Millicent Roberts.
And why would I want to know that??
6. Eating a packet of crisps a day is equivalent to drinking five litres of cooking oil a year.
And that is why my kids can OD on chocos all they want but will never consume a crisp in their life so long as I can help it:P The thing's icky.
7.For every 10 successful attempts to climb Mount Everest there is one fatality.
Oh well, I guess it makes sense.
8. Cows can have regional accents, says a professor of phonetics, after studying cattle in Somerset.
Oh boy! That's hilarious!!! Don't you think it's hilarious???
9. Forty-one percent of English women have punched or kicked their partners, according to a study.
To all the guys out there: BEWARE of English women!! oh and I don't kick. I think :P
10. A domestic cat can frighten a black bear to climb a tree.
What I would give to see that happen. What I would give to see Fosto2 make this happen!
11. Hexakosioihexekontahexaphobiacs is the term for people who fear the number 666.
hehehehehehehe I can't make up my mind on what's more ridiculously hilarious; the fact that there are actually people who FEAR the number 666, or that there is actually a term for it, or the fact that the term is THAT LONG.
12. Camel's milk, which is widely drunk in Arab countries, has 10 times more iron than cow's milk.
yeeaaaahh... Still not gonna drink it, thank you.
13. Thinking about your muscles can make you stronger.
I'm off. Gonna go "think me" some six packs!:P

Infant 101 anyone?

It's hardly a secret that I love kids. Adore them more like it. Getting along with kids is second nature to me, I don't have to think twice about it. It just happens, just like that! We bond and mush together with ease. Like peanut butter and jelly, cookies n milk, and hot pizza and a corny movie- you know what I'm talking about! I love their company, truly and honestly. When I laugh with them, it's with my whole heart. And if I look like I'm enjoying myself, it's because I truly am!

Well, almost all kids. The ones older than 2 years anyway. Yes, recent exposure to infants has forced me to conclude without a shadow of doubt that I know absolutely nothing, zilch, nil, about handling newborn babies! It's almost embarrassing.
I should have a disclaimer attached to me: "Safe to use on kids 2+ years old".

If you think about it, I'm not to blame. We have absolutely NO infants in the family. The last baby we had was my cousin and she's now 13! (yep, it's that bad).
And the kids you see in the streets and malls with their parents are at least 6 months of age, nothing tinier. So my exposure to infants is nonexistent. (Well, unless you count the times when random people or folks I literally just met show me pics of their nieces and nephews on their mobiles. Yeah. What's that about??).

You can imagine then my shock when I actually come face to face with a newborn baby. I haven't been put in such a situation since a long time, but now that some of my friends are having their own babies, I often find myself confusedly staring at a pacifier or marvelling at a pampers box. I tell you, fascinating.

Who knew anything could be so ridiculously tiny- let alone a full functioning human being. With fingers, nose, toes and the whole package! They are SO TINY AND CUTE, it's kind of scary. Just a tad.

Good news is, I'm almost over my "What do you mean THAT'S IT??? Where's the REST OF her!!!" days. I almost react "normally" when I see them ("AwwwwwW, can I borrow her for a week???" is normal right?). Bad news is, that doesn't in anyway imply that I know the first thing about handling them.

My obvious ignorance notwithstanding, the minute I'm around them, I'm dying to hold them. So their mommies- against the better judgment of their maternal instincts- go ahead and give me their babies to carry.

Yikes. That's when the troubles start. I look as awkward, confused and nervous as I was during my Calculus 102 course in my first year at college (and that's saying something:P).

Today me and a teacher who works with me went to visit our friend Tina. She has a month old angelic baby girl called "Mia". She was dressed up in the cutest outfit as she lay in her crib staring at the weird ladies peeking over her. She looked like the cutest thing as she sucked on her "I love mama" pacifier.

My fellow teacher (a mother of four) expertly lifted her up and carried her for a while. Mia didn't complain, she's such a sweet-natured and social baby. She just observed what's happening with interest. It was endearing.
"My turn! My turn! I wanna carry her!"
After a great deal of fiddling from my part, I managed to carry her properly with her head supported and all that (I think). I then dutifully proceeded with the standard annoying baby talk, kisses till her cheeks are swollen and pulling weird faces that aim to amuse but usually scare the poor things!

My friends were chatting away together, when suddenly Tina paused for a second, glanced at me and laughed. "You're wondering: how the heck do I put her back in- aren't you?"
I was standing over the crib frozen in a weird posture. My body was arched forward and my hands half extended as if to place her back in, but not actually completing the move. It was as if someone had pressed the "pause" button and left to get a coke from the fridge but never came back. My face was screwed in concentration as I indeed was wondering how to place her back in since I had to somehow flip her around so her head is in the right direction. (Wow that sounds even stupider in typing:P)

I had been stuck like that for the last 3 minutes, but now mommy came to the rescue. Phew. I have a feeling I would've stayed there for quite some time!

Over coffee and cake they sat sharing stories about things like formula milk and the best brand of pampers and how swollen your feet get when you're pregnant.
If you think that I felt out of place and couldn't contribute to the conversation then I must say: shame on you.
Since when has knowing nothing about the subject stood in the way of my babbling???

Without invitation, I'd burst out with stuff like: "oooooh that's just like the time I went to the pharmacy and got formula milk for the abandoned kittens my sis and I found".

What? Why are you staring at me like that? It's not the same? really? Not even a tad? Okay.. *timidly*
What about when I had to feed Maple (a tiny orphan donkey) at the animal shelter from a bottle every two hours?
Or when I had to wake up every hour at night to check if my favorite cartoons was on.

Still no?

Right. I'll get back to my cake.

Those were the days my friend!

College days.... Don't you just miss them?

You know how they say you should cherish and embrace each stage of your life, cuz it's unique in what it has and offers? I'm all for that. Really.
It's just that there's something about college days that grabs you. It keeps you hooked, keeps you missing, keeps you nostalgic and gets you mushy-wushy at the mention of it!
You may someday grow old and bold and forget what a toothbrush is used for or what your name is, and wonder things like "who the heck are these kids and why are they calling me grandma"- but the memory of that bizarre professor or that sleepover (aka "project work") with friends will be vivid and glowing like it was yesterday.

I still love to hear my mom and dad recall funny college stories. Like the time my mom and her friends cooked about 5 packets of Spaghetti at once cuz "it looked so little and we estimated each would eat a whole packet"! Still gets me laughing!

It's universal really. Just take a closer look next time someone recalls a college experience. Be it a fresh grad, or your parents or someone old and cranky- it's always the same silly grin, dreamy eyes and excited heart.

Where else in life could you get away with the things you did in college? Today I sat with my friend Samar sharing our college stories. She's an architecture student so it was like hearing my sister's stories all over again:) I love architecture students. Their lives are amusing to observe (at a safe distance!! Me? zero sleep? yeah RIGHT).

You could do everything and anything on a whim. Watch two movies in a row, have a kitkat chunky for breakfast/lunch and/or dinner, and go out wearing unmatched bright colored socks cuz that's all what's left in your drawer.

You had friends come over whenever. My friends learnt (the hard way) that they can never expect what they'll be greeted with. If I had just returned home or was just about to leave I'd be dressed up (oh well by my standards anyway), if I had just woken up or simply didn't feel like changing, I'd still be in my Winnie the Pooh PJs, and if it's laundry day, well, you don't wanna know.

If they were lucky enough to visit on a week that me and my sis managed to get groceries, then they'll find their visit to the fridge rewarding. Otherwise, it's water (usually) and that questionable green moldy thing that we're too afraid to touch and throw away!

But then there were the days they'd come over and find me making cookies, or my sis cooking amazing food. We'd earn total forgiveness from the second bite they took!

At one point or another during my college experience I've used one of these "inviting" sentences to get my friends to come over:

"Hey I've got pizza and a movie, wanna join?" (an ultimate favorite and best turnout rates)
"So i've discovered we have some food in the fridge after all- OMG did that lettuce just move???? HOLY....- so, interested?" (This elicited different responses. My friends who were living in the comfort of their parents' homes mumbled something about finding new friends and hung up. Similarly deprived friends would show up in about 10 minutes).
"I just put the lasagna in the oven. You've got 30 minutes to be here" (they always made it on time!)
"My mom sent us a box of snickers." (Again, great turnout rates).

I had plans with Samar today. She came to my house right after she got off work and we had iftar together. We wanted to go for a brisk walk on the sea side afterwards.
Me: So, you're still up for that walk?
Samar: SURE thing! Go get ready.

Five minutes and 10 layers later (hey I like to stay warm:P) I went in my room just to find Samar has collapsed on my bed. I called her once or twice, but she was fast asleep. I covered her with a blanket, shut the room door and here I am typing.

Well, I guess there will always be a part of college lingering still :)

I'll go fix something sweet to OD on together once she's awake and the (only too familiar) unsuppressible late-afternoon-sugar-craving strikes.

What do you know, college days are back!

A Great Companion

"If we examine the trials and tribulations all over earth, we'll find they are rooted in human hearts. Every criminal, miser, abuser, scoffer, embezzler, and hateful person does what he or she does because of a diseased heart. So if you want to change our world, do not begin by rectifying the outward. Instead, change the condition of the inward. It is from the unseen world that the phenomenal world emerges, and it is from the unseen realm of our hearts that all actions spring...."

Excerpted from Hamza Yusuf's "Purification Of The Heart"- my favorite book in the whole wide world!

I wish that each and every one of us would have a copy of this book. A copy not just to read once and stash away, half-hidden on a library shelf. But a copy that remains by our side, continuously read, re-read and pondered. This isn't a normal book that you can afford to read, put aside and remember some of it but forget most.
Every page in this book is a unique jewel, glowing with meanings that will stir your mind, heart and soul. You are left feeling awed, inspired and thirsty for more.

Last night before I fell asleep, I sat in my bed reading it with only my side lamp on. Even though I had read those very same pages before, the experience was just as spiritually uplifting, thought provoking, and surreal. I was momentarily transferred to somewhere else... someowhere much purer.

This book tackles each and every disease that manifests itself within the hearts in the form of hatred, miserliness, envy, arrogance, vanity, anger, fraud and headlessness.
It speaks of all those diseases and many more, and discusses their underlying causes and cures.
Can you imagine a world free of those ungodly traits?

You can't change the world, or the fact that it is full of such diseases. What you can do however, is stop cursing the world and start working on yourself. Together, we must embark on this journey of purification. Let's start from our hearts.... that's what will really count at the end.

The Qoran verse describes the Day of Judgement as a day in which neither wealth nor children shall be of any benefit [to anyone], except one who comes to God with a sound heart (Quran, 26:88-89)

I'll leave you with another random excerpt I read today:

"There is foolishness in being vain about what one has accomplished, given its ephemeral nature. But when one is thankful to God and acknowledges and praises Him as the source of this goodness, then the accomplishment outlasts our earthly lives and the memories of people, for God preserves it."

This is probably way off topic here, but this is how Hamza Yusuf chooses to end his "Acknowledgments" section:
Finally, my immense gratitude goes to the mother of my children, Liliana, whose pure heart is fortunate enough not to need the content of this book.

I was so touched, I wanted to cry.

Isn't it the sweetest thing? EVER..

A white christmas in Kuwait

As I left the warmth and coziness of my bed this morning, reluctantly tearing myself away from my soft comforter, I hurriedly wrapped my robe around me and slipped my feet into my sheep-shaped pantoufle (man I love those animal shaped pantoufles, so cute! Thanks sis!).

I washed my face and then, still drowsy, headed to the kitchen to warm my milk for my latte. Minutes later, with my "Life Is Good" mug in hand (along with my coconut cookies.. MMmmm), I made my way to the dining room where I found my dad reading the paper while sipping his coffee, and my mom drinking her latte while gazing at the morning sky from the veranda glass doors.

I joined them. It felt so nice. I miss them! I know it might sound weird, since, well, I do live with them, but I really don't get to see them much. That's the thing with "modern life", we're all so busy and finding time to sit together is becoming a rare commodity. But I guess that makes you appreciate such moments even more:)

After a few sips out of my latte, my brain was starting to function again and my awareness of my surroundings returning to almost normal levels (which is not that impressive to begin with:P).
I glanced at the veranda glass and GASPED....

WHITE. That's ALL I could see! A world of WHITE out there, in KUWAIT, right outside my window... Who would've ever imagined!!!! I was dumbstruck.....

No, of course it's not SNOW silly (got you there didn't I?:P)

It's fog! But it's soooooooooooo thick you really can't see a few meters away from you!

I excitedly jumped out of my chair (getting myself one heck of a head rush in the process) and opened the veranda doors to have a closer look at the vanilla white sky (darn, wrong choice of words, completely spoiled the romantic picture for myself since the movie "Vanilla sky" remains to be one of my most traumatizing experiences- EVER).

And the best part is, there's no dust! When I see a white sky in Kuwait it always means dusty weather.. which is the worst thing in the whole world.

But now, on the 7th floor, it felt like we were floating amidst the clouds:) I was so thrilled...

So for those of you celebrating Christmas in Kuwait, looks like you'll be getting your "White Christmas" after all!

Weekend-induced babbling

I'm usually easy going enough to get along at least fairly well with most people. I keep confrontations minimal, unless the occasion seriously calls for it. (I feel I must point out however that in cases where sinfully yummy chocolates are involve I adopt more of a "Touch That and you DIE" approach. I find it yields better results!;)

Anyhow, back to what I was saying... What was I saying? Oh yeah. I try to be so-called open-minded, tolerant and accepting of differences. I realise that no two people are alike. I understand that we all come from different backgrounds and experiences that shape us differently. I'm all for freedom of speech (well more or less anyway!). I don't expect (or want) everyone to be and think like me. That would be way too boring. I might not agree but I try to respect differing points of view and outlooks on life. I really do work on myself in that area. I try to empathize with people, heck I think I even have a book about empathy stacked somewhere in Amman, which I had bought sometime into my first year of college (Dalia let it go :P)

But there are certain things that I fail to understand. They go right over my head. No matter how hard I try, I fail miserably to see the other perspective. Empathy training going down the drain! I relate to nothing. Zilch. Nil. So I'm just giving up. I doubt I'll be able to remember everything, but here's a few of the things I DON'T GET, off the top of my head:

1. I don't get people's fascination with gossip. I just don't. It's petty, it's ridiculous, it's pointless, it's rude and it's just plain sad. The worst part is: it's everywhere!!! LIVE AND LET LIVE, will you?

2. Heels heels heels. What's up with that? Why would anyone in their right mind want to torture themselves, sustain permanent damage to their spinal cords, get blisters the size of an elephant- that-ate-too-much-for-dinner, just for the sake of looking a few inches taller?

3. Why are men wearing pink these days? And I'm talking VIVID fuchsia that literally hurts your eyes! Honestly. Of all the ways to make a statement and stand out, this must be the ultimate worst (maybe not, but would definitely be a finalist!).

4. You know the cliche "The best invention since sliced bread"? Well I'm proposing a slightly altered version: "The worst invention since air fresheners"!! Seriously, did the guy who invented air fresheners stop for a second to actually think about what they truly do? I mean not only do they smell so strong- usually leaving me feeling nauseous- but the idea that all they do is cover up a foul smell giving people the false impression of clean and fresh air is sickening. Call me crazy but I would much rather know that there is a bad smell in the air and avoid it, than sit there inhaling what truly is "lemon-scented sewage".

5. I FAIL to see what's so "sexy" about wearing animal prints. I think they are tacky and disgusting, and no I don't give a monkey's tail if it's in or not. UGH.

6. Reality shows. Don't even get me started. No seriously, you don't want to get me started. Reality my, um, leftover molded pizza slice from college days (Yes I do pride myself for not using swear words:P)! I don't buy that for a second. And why oh why would I want to spend countless hours watching people live "really" on TV, when all I have to do is get my bottom off the couch and go outside to the REAL world. And to see how widespread they've become, and how millions of people are hooked to them- it's heartbreaking. I personally consider it a "Reality Show Epidemic", one that deserves immediate international attention and remedial plans!

7. Smoking. The formula is simple: If you smoke, you have a zero chance to make it to my good books. Stay away with your stinky breath, yellow teeth and inconsiderate soul that CHOOSES to poison itself and everyone around! That and one whiff of smoke fires up my allergy and sinusitis. Utter agony.

8. Why do they make commercials that are PAINFULLY lame and irritating. Isn't a commercial supposed to grab your attention and get to you? Hey I'm easily impressionable, and yet most of the commercials on TV leave me sulking and unentertained. You know that "Fair and Lovely" commercial, with that stupid lady saying "ra2am 7azzi arba3a"- I seriously wanna kill myself every time I watch it. What do they take us for? A bunch of retards???

9. It seems like every passing second witnesses the birth of a "New Fragrance for Men" or "New Fragrance for Women". I can't help but wonder, isn't there like a limit to how creative you can get with fragrances? Will they ever run out? And are they REALLY all different?
I wouldn't know. I admit to knowing very little about fragrances. I hate strong ones though, can't handle them. It has to be very very subtle to win me over. I love men's fragrances though, that is not to say I know anything about them. For me it's just two categories "Nice" and "UGH WHAT THE...???". I discovered I was a total hopeless case during a stop-over at Heathrow airport. I found myself drawn to the endless shelves displaying all kinds of fragrances. I decided I might as well overcome my ignorance and who knows maybe I'm not so bad after all. I spent like an hour sniffing fragrances, trying to choose a nice one for my bro. After smelling half the place I finally had two fragrances to choose between. They were both really nice, but well, um, the same!!
A lady working there sensed my dilemma and asked if I needed help. I cheerfully (with my new-found fragrance-savvy confidence) said: "Well, I wanna get either of these. But I feel they are pretty much the same, so I can't really choose".

YOU. SHOULD. HAVE. SEEN. HER. EXPRESSION.

It was a mixture of horror, disbelief, disgust and mindblowing SHOCK.
She practically jumped at my throat with a "WHAT??? they are COMPLETELY different!!!!".

"Right. errr, I knew that. of course I knew that. I'll take the, um, the one to the right, no left, no no right. Yes, yes that one."

And that was the last time I ventured anywhere near a perfume shop:)


Hmm... I've been babbling without a pause I am not quite sure where I headed and if it has anything to do with where I started!!
But you prolly guessed already. I needed to vent out! Tough week, tough week. The little squirts are wearing me thin!

Wow, certainly feels good to get it off my chest. And now that the weekend's here, I can begin to kick back and savor ever minute of it... Yay!:D

You gotta love the weekend (it's more of a "long term relationship based on mutual respect and total adoration" for me!! hehehe)

Interested? Anyone?

I'm sitting in class staring at a water balloon that we used in an experiment earlier, and there's just one irrepressible thought in my head: Water balloon fight!

You know what I'm talking about... balloons shooting in the air, getting drenched from head to toe (and getting scolded by your mom later on, but that's besides the point:P), piercing screams as the chilly water meets your face, uncontrollable laughter, and endless joy. Aah, the excitment a water balloon fight can bring!

At least for today, that's all I want in life:)

The Young and the Restless (no I don't watch soaps:P)

It's only on very very rare occasions that I wish I was older, wiser and scarier! But it was hard not to feel so today:

(Time: Recess - Place: my classroom)

*classroom door opens slowly*
Hamad and Abdulla: Ms. Mariam you told us we could come in recess to finish the poster?
Me: sure go ahead, grab the markers and get to work.
Hamad: Teacher you wear glasses!
Me: Yep, for reading I do.
Hamad: But why do you wear glasses? are you big or small?
Me: Huh? You mean like my age?
Hamad: Yes.
Me: I'm 22.
Hamad: OLLAAAHHH (this is a purely kuwaiti exclamation word! I like it!) teacher you are very small.

Need I remind him that he's, like, NINE. Honestly.

And another delightful convo with one of the boys from 4A- the crazy class.

(Time: praying recess- Place: playground)

Abdulaziz: Miss Mariam why do you get upset from us in class and yell.
Me: Gee I dunno, maybe cuz you act crazy.
Abdulaziz: hehehehe
Me: Do you act like this in other classes? Do you do this in the English class?
Abdulaziz: oh NO. We don't make a single sound in the English class.
Me: WHY???
Abdulaziz: because we are scared of the teacher very much.
Me: What! why are you not scared of me???
Abdulaziz: Because you are kind.

Right.
Note to self: for instant classroom discipline results, become a mean old lady:P

It's raining It's pouring

It is!
Been raining all day:)

I love the rain.

And I'll leave you with a line from "My favorite things" from The Sound Of Music.

Raindrops on roses
and whiskers on Kittens.
Bright copper kettles
and warm woolen mittens.

Girls in white dresses
with blue satin sashes.
Snowflakes that stay
on my nose and eyelashes.

Silver white winters
that melt into springs.
These are a few of my favorite things!

They are:)

A Chewy Gooey Backup Plan

If for whatever reason my teaching career ever crumbles, this is what I'll be doing with my life:

I figure, I'd still be seeing a lot of kids, and getting them to adore me wouldn't be a problemo at all!;)

I made those coconut cookies last night- they are decadently chewy... Ahh, these babies are so darn good!

Me loves cookies. Much too much.

Kid Goggles: Grab one!

I was at The Sultan Center yesterday with my parents. It was a Thursday night, so the place was buzzing. Shopping carts whooshing by, escalators in constant motion, hurried footsteps, cans free-falling off shelves and rolling on the floor, plastic bags crackling- it was nothing short of a sound mosaic. No one seemed to notice or care though. We were all engrossed in our own thing, mindlessly contributing to the big noisy picture.

Suddenly, something changed. There was a sound rising above the rest of the commotion, it was getting more and more distinct and distinguishable against the noisy background. I paused and concentrated, there was no mistake, it was loud and hearty giggles and shrieks, the kind usually reserved for breathtaking rides in Disney World, or roller coasters in the Six Flags.

I craned my neck trying locate the source, everyone around seemed to do the exact same thing.
Bingo! Spotted. It was coming from the electronics section. Apparently there was a video camera on display and it was connected to a wide screen TV and two girls (I'd say they looked about 10 years old) were having a field day doing silly poses in front of it and watching the effect on the big screen. And not far away was what I assumed must be their mother or auntie carrying her mobile and taking pictures of what obviously is a very very happy time for them!

Everyone seemed to have stopped what they were doing and just stood there watching their excitment, it was contagious. The girls were hopping on their very own cloud number 9!

Eventually everyone went on with what they had been doing, and we walked passed them. But hours later, their giggles still echoed in my head...
What struck me most about the whole scene, what truly took my breath away, was the joy the girls seemed to derive from the simplest of things. How many grown ups must've passed by this very same display unaffected, unimpressed and definitely uninterested? Countless I'm sure.

This is yet another magical ingredient in the make up of children. They notice, they appreciate, and boy do they get thrilled!
Do you realise how EASY it is to get kids excited? A seemingly trivial thing to you can generate a wave of gasps from a bunch of wide-eyed children. Anything and everything has potential to be fun and exciting. How great is that?

It is a gift we seem to lose as we grow older, and it saddens me beyond description. Becoming obnoxiously blasé seems to be the trend, and "lame" is a label we pass around only too generously. Day by day we become even more high maintenance, harder to impress, and almost impossible to entertain. Comedies that sent us in uncontrollable fits of laughter a few years ago, no longer elicit so much as a smile. Songs that used to play nonstop on our casettes are suddenly badly written. Your favorite cafe is no long posh enough and an evening of boardgames and pillow fights is unthinkable.
We're imprisoned within the walls of the "standards" we live by. They serve the purpose of giving us a deluded sense of importance and style.

I say it's time we make some changes. It's time we stop teaching kids and start learning from THEM.
For once lets not raise the bar. Only this time, let's not aim high or dream big. let's return to basics, and re-learn how to cherish and embrace the small joys of life.

Next time you're with kids, do not attempt to raise them to your level. Instead kneel down to theirs. It's a totally different view down there; a mesmerising thrill-laden hidden aspect of the same picture. Put on your "kid goggles" and dare to explore!

Blogger may not reply for he/she "appears to be offline"

You know what I think is the greatest invention ever? (yep, even greater than Cassereccio's Nutella pizza- okay okay maybe not:P) It's the "appear offline" mode on MSN. Pure genius.

If you often choose the "appear offline" mode offhandedly, I must ask you to stop and ponder this for a second. Do you realise the power it gives you? To be around and yet invisible. To observe, but not be observed. To mingle, yet not socialize. To hide, and yet not feel lonesome. You're free to stare, smile, frown or dish out incomprehensible babble at people for as long as you like! (NO of course I don't do that! The idea!)

Take that and apply it to real life and what do you get? AWESOMENESS!
I could most definitely use that during some of my days you know. Ahhhh, what I wouldn't do for an hour of "appear offline" in real life... ;)

Their Smiling World

"Ms. Mariam I wanna say something! Please please pleeeeeeeease"- Nasser's voice shot up during today's science class about "shadows". He's such a great kid; as cute and sweet as they come:) I told him to go ahead, and watched as he hopped out of his seat and helped himself to a marker and headed to the whiteboard where I guessed he was going to illustrate something to us. I watched curiously so see what he's going to draw, and soon realised he was drawing the sun. He started with the circle, then the rays shining around it, then- to my amusement- went ahead and added eyes and a smiling mouth to the sun :)
He did that so matter-of-factly, and it prompted no giggles or teasing from the other kids, that I had to conclude that as far as fourth graders are concerned, the sun is a person and a happy one at that!

Last year when I was with Grade 1 girls, I learnt to expect anything and everything they drew to smile at me; be it stars, clouds or even a pair of socks!
Then I moved to teaching grade four boys, and in so many ways that was a totally different experience. And yet, in so many ways, it was the same.

Looking at the sun smiling at me today made me feel that more strongly than ever. Grade 1 or Grade 4, boys or girls, angels or devils, the fact is: they're KIDS!
I dunno, something about kids never fails to marvel, amuse and completely bewitch me.
Some must be thinking it's "just a smiling sun", what's the big deal? Well, the way I see it, it's an inside scoop on the children's little minds. If you think about it, you'll find it to be pretty interesting. When kids draw, they individualize everything, and almost always add the element of feeling. The sun is happy, and so it is smiling. They would almost always choose a smiling face, because that's what they feel is the normal. This is the world as they see it, feel it and love it to be. Everything around them smiles. If a child draws something with a sad face, ask them why. They'd always have a reason to share. Always.

I went on a journey down memory lane trying to recall the last time I drew my sun with a smiley face on it. But for the life of me, I couldn't remember. Does any of you guys remember? When do we decide we are too grown up to add features to our drawings. Does it happen gradually or is it abrupt, as in your sun was smiling yesterday and today it's faceless. Just like that.

At which point exactly in our lives does the sun stop smiling?

Or maybe my question should be... when exactly does the world stop smiling at us?

Just Say NO

Two days ago when I was still unable to get my hands on my allergy nasal spray, I surfed the net for "natural remedies" in a desperate attempt to ease up my worsening condition.

I got the nasal spray eventually. I've used it ever since, along with my pills, and have been showing considerable improvement Alhamdillah. But the all too familiar irritated, burning and dried up sensation in my nose, throat and lungs- although much better- was still there when I woke up this Friday morning.

I suddenly remembered one of the sites recommending "Apple Cider Vinegar" as a allergy wonder drug. They seemed to know what they were talking about. There were well above a 100 reviews from people who tried it and said it worked like a charm.

So I tried it today. The instructions were simple and straightforward. Pour 1/8 of a cup vinegar and drink it in one go or dilute it with water and sip it throughout the day.
I went with the all-at-once option (well not really, I'm so finicky about drinking liquids besides water, milk and fresh juices. And I'm a disaster when it comes to liquid medicines, I just refuse them upfront forcing the Dr. to find me a pill alternative, while he mumbles something about me being a big baby!)

Now I do realise that vinegar is hardly similar to a drug, but it still tastes so strong and stings the throat and so I kept taking minute sips and choking on it and was (apparently) enjoying the drama because my mom eventually had enough and yelled something about me getting a life and gulping it up and getting it over with:P)

I did. And boy do I wish I didn't.

IT'S SO STRONG. I think major parts of my throat/oesophagus and intestines have disintegrated- honest!! I worry about the wellbeing of my digestive system.

I quickly tried to change the taste. I first drank water, but I was still in agony. So I went ahead and gobbled up milk, dates, nuts and a banana.

Now I'm stuffed and nauseous- and the vinegar aftertaste is still alive and strong.

When I first surfed the "natural remedies" site, and saw the multitude of natural alternatives available, I wondered how come more people don't give up pharmaceutical drugs and turn to home remedies.

Oh well, now I know why:P

Here's to my tasteless allergy pills and my odorless nasal spray! I love you guys.

Very well then, a review it is!

(Title has been changed at the request of Ms. Ivory:P)

Thanks to Ivory's very enlightening and touching film reviews and my regained ability to breathe (Ilhamdila and thanks dad!:D), I was able to watch my first and the last film in the Film Week at Kuwait University.

I'll leave the bulk of the review on you Ivory, you do it so well:)

I'll just share a couple of thoughts..

The one thing that kept ringing in my head from the very start, as I skimmed through the brochure reading the other movie synopsis, and all through the movie and on my way home with my dad was: "I wish I wish I knew about this before. I SO wanna watch the other movies"!

But at least I got to attend the finale:) And I must say it was wonderful.

It's a documentary called "Bits and Pieces", filmed in Lebanon after the civil war was over. It was around the time people were supposed to be moving on and building their lives again. The movie voiced these different people, with their very different outlooks on life and on the future. I loved the fact that the movie wasn't rooting for any side, it was simply exposing the different parts of the story, with equal importance and freedom..

Again, I'm not going to review it:) But I'll just talk about one scene that I thought rang so true to our lives. It was about a single mom raising her two small girls (adorable, especially the younger one!). She just sat there wondering how to raise her girls. Should she just raise them knowing that the only future they have is that of a wife raising kids, with minimum choices and freedoms. Or should she tell me they can be whatever they want, independent, free and outspoken, then risk having them shocked and out casted by a society that doesn't have space for such people.

She then talked about herself, said she never really felt she completely fit in the Lebanese society, she always felt a bit awkward, as she was raised in an European way.
But then (and here's the twist) when she moved to live in Europe, she just couldn't cope. She was too oriental to completely fit in there as well. She stood out, she simply didn't fit. Unable to cope, she returned to Lebanon.

How sad is that? When you can't fit in with your own people cuz you are too different, and yet not different enough to fit somewhere else... it just got me thinking...

Oh Oh I wanna say one more thing, can I?:P
Another part that totally cracked me up, was this girl from "Ashrafiyyeh", talking about how different "her people" are from "those muslims" in West Beirut. She said she just couldn't ever imagine marrying a Muslim, cuz their mentalities are nothing alike (until now I had no problem!).
I was thinking.. that's true. Afterall a girl raised in a certain very free way would find Islamic values restricting.
But then she had to go ahead and elaborate saying that the reason the christian society in Ashrafiyyeh is so different than the Muslim society was because it is- and I quote- "So pure and chaste", while apparently the Muslim counterpart leaves a lot to be desired!

Now far be it from me to label people or anything and I'm nothing close to a Lebanese expert, socially or politically. But I know enough to have the words "Pure" &"Ashrafiyyeh" in the same sentence elicit a wave of amused giggles!
But I could be mistaken of course. Admittedly, my knowledge stems mainly from my "muslim lebanese friends" and, well, "Ashrafiyyeh girls" jokes:) hehe
Yep, not the most reliable or impartial sources I must admit:)

But laughing aside, the movie showed how broken the society truly is, how seperated and estranged. It's sad really.
During the discussion afterwards, a girl pointed out that we just have too MUCH identity in our societies. Everyone is so obsessed and so rigid and hard-headed when it comes to their identity. She suggested people focus more on the common grounds we share, like the fact that we are all humans at the end of the day. Why should a difference on one point overshadow agreement on several?

As I walked out of the building with my dad, I overheard two college students talking. The girl said something that I found to be very true.
"The thing is, people only become too focused and rigid about their identities, when it is under attack".
Isn't that so true? Maybe if we stop attacking each other's identities and continuously trying to prove that ours is better, maybe just maybe, the differences will then dissolve. No one will care anymore. They will no longer be highlighted- the one and ony point of focus.

Just maybe.

Okay I'll shut up now, because as I said before, this is NOT a film review I promise:P (this honestly started out as a 2 liner before bed, and now it's a full-fledged post. I am out of control!!!)

Despite the fact that the film was captivating and I was so into it, by the time we reached the last 5 minutes I was actually dozing off for a second here or there. This is what I call the "Wednesday Phenomenon"- suddenly all the sleep debt strikes back, with vengeance!

And, when Mr. sleep strikes, there is no fighting back;)

Off to my bed I go!

Breathless. Really.

I am positively fuming. I feel like yelling and shouting, but I can't. I physically can't. Apparently, for you to be able to shout properly you need to be able to take a deep breath, which at the moment is beyond my reach.

My nose is completely blocked and so is my chest. It feels like something is stuffed into my lungs, pushing back any oxygen that dares to make its way in.
Welcome to the world of allergy.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining of my allergy, I'm way past that stage now. I've long learnt to live peacefully- if not in complete harmony- with it, mainly by sticking to a very strict diet made out of allergy pills, and nasal sprays (that cost me a fortune). I practically live off that stuff.

The nasal sprays I use have Cortison in them, not a lot, but enough to actually be effective. As I said, I use them for the most part of the year (more so now that I'm here in Kuwait, with all the dust and humidity around). In Jordan I simply went to get a new spray when it was done.
Now everytime I want to get a nasal spray, it's a battle.

They don't give it away without a prescription and NOT any prescription mind you. It has to be on bright yellow paper and decorated with a gazillion stamps.

So today I left school early as soon as I was done with my last class of the day, then shot off to the public clinic. I knew there's no way in hell they'd give me the nasal spray (you see, such expensive drugs are only given to Kuwaitis, because apparently some people are worth getting medication and some aren't. Don't even get me started on that). But all I wanted was a prescription and I'd buy it from a pharmacy outside. I didn't see the point of going to a private clinic and paying an arm and a leg, when I knew exactly what's wrong with me (after 8 years of sneezing and Kleenex-consuming, you do know!!) and knew what I needed. A presciption with "Nasonex" written on it. That's all I ask for!

I saw the Dr. and of course she said she can't provide me with the Nasal Spray and I told her I just need the prescription. She gave me that, on yellow paper (I made sure it was yellow, don't want painful history to repeat itself) and then had to drive around trying to find an open pharmacy since it was noon time and most of them were closed.

In one pharmacy and out of another till I gave up. The smaller pharmacies didn't have it, then one pharmacist told me blankly "But even if I had it, I can't give it to you."

"WHY???" I said. "It is yellow, isn't it?" (let me guess, not the right shade of yellow??)
"I know. But it's missing another two stamps. In addition to the Dr. at the clinic you must go to a hosptial and get more stamps and signitures. This prescription won't get you the spray."

WHAT THE HECK. ALL that for a tiny bottle of allergy nasal spray?? You'd think I was asking for a Heroin prescription!!! (not that I know what's that like:P)

I swear to God, if this is not ridiculous, nothing is.

In protest, I will remain breathless. (not exactly by choice, but whatever.)

You make me happy when skies are grey:)

I think I broke a personal record today! I've been out of the house for 14 hours straight- from 6:30 am. till 8:30 p.m.!

I had my normal school day, followed by a 2 hour workshop, then being thrown around (literally) for an hour and a half in my Ju-Jitsu class. What more can a girl want? (lets see.... A truck loaded with Godiva, Guccis for free, a call from Richard Gere- yep, a lot apparently:P)

It was a great day il hamdillah. I'm very happy and thankful, especially after surviving a day like yesterday. But that's the beauty of life I guess... One day it's a "series of unfortunate events" that leaves you desperate and in tears. Come next day though, and it could be the total opposite. You can never tell what's hidden for you around the corner, you just have to stick it out and take it like a man (or a woman as the case may be:P). As one of my favorite oldies beautifully puts it: "Along with the sunshine, there's gotta be a little rain sometime":) But let me not get carried away trying to sound so wise and deep and monkish:)

So back to talking about my great day. I am faced with a dilemma. I am now forced to devise a new scale for measuring great days. Or, wait, maybe SSS can serve a double purpose! Darn, I'm good. So on a scale from 1-10 (based on SSS- Standard SUPER-DUPERNESS scale), today was a solid 20:)

Actually, it would've been 10, but then I had this conversation with one of my kids in 4C at the very last period of the day as I lined them up after the praying recess....

Ahmed: Ms. Mariam I wish we had science 8 times not just 3.
Me: awww, I wish so too hon! I love your class. I really really do.

I do:)

How would your day score?

As far as sucky days go, and on a scale from 1-10 (based on SSS- Standard Suckiness Scale), I think today must've scored an easy 17.5!

On the bright side though, my dad just called and I now have confirmed reservation for my mid-year break. Going to Jordan from 25th Jan. till 8th Feb, exactly two weeks. Yay!!!

This is my light at the end of the tunnel:) (and by tunnel I mean my classes with 4A and 4D)

Seriously, I teach 4 different classes (4A 4B 4C 4D) and so I give the same lesson 4 times. And it's always this way:

4C: Total success! Fun, productive, we laugh and I love my job and feel good about myself. I adore the kids!
4B: Mostly a success, a crazy boy here and there, but mostly controlable and productive.
4D: Unpredictable, could be a success (one in a very very BRIGHT blue moon) or a lesson down the drain. The kids are smart but very susceptible to acting out (VERY).
4A: I run outside my classroom like a maniac! A crazy bunch of illiterate gits!:P

I think "home schooling" is a dying gem of an invention- more parents should consider this option! I will start a "teach your OWN kids thank you very much" support group. Recruitment is open as of this second!

Great suddenly even my blog is acting crazy, all the editing options in my "create blog" are no where to be seen. I can't do anything except type, I can't change the font, add a link, add a photo. And since I haven't slept at all last night I'm sure I made a gazillion spelling mistake and now I can't evne spell check.

I think it's now a solid 22 on the SSS. Yep, at least!

Boy am I cranky:)

I better go and do some "meditation", at least I won't have trouble finding my mantra...

"I'm going to Amman... SOON"
"I'm going to my lovely pizza place... SOON"
"I'm going to hug my fat cat.... SO SOON"
"I'm going to have friends again...SOOO SOO SOON":D

Now THAT is my kinda meditation:)

No Pain No Gain?

A glimpse of today's Ju-Jitsu class:

Sensei Nadine: Alright, now we'll be working in pairs throwing each other 20 hip throws nonstop. Lets race two pairs at a time and the rest referee to see who finishes first! Mariam, you're up with me.
Mariam: cool!
Sensei Nadine: Ready?
Mariam (filled with happiness and hope): YEP:D
Sensei Nadine: If we lose, I'll kill you.
Mariam (amused): hehehe
Nadine: I hate to lose.
Mariam (now actually giggling): hehehehe alright!
Nadine (menacingly): I MEAN it.
Mariam (Hope and happiness gone- UTTER PANIC instead:P): *gulp*

We won.
I think I suffered a mild head concussion as a result! (Hey try being thrown 20 times in a row by a black belt in a hurry:P)

Great- a death threat AND head concussion in less than 3 minutes. Remind me again why do I pay and drive 30 minutes to do that?

Maybe I should take up something less traumatizing, like say, expressive dance?

HEHEHEHEHE
I couldn't even keep a straight face as I typed this! It would be cool actually to try it out. Only problem is, the only thing the instructor will "express" is the desperate need to kick me out:P

Oh well, head concussions it is then. Ouch- I think I twisted my nose! I'm not kidding!

In love- 30 years late:P

So I'm like the most ignorant person when it comes to music. I never ever remember the names of bands and singers. This is mostly because I'm, well, not interested. I appreciate a good song (soft rock, no screaming, yelling or- God forbid- rap and heavy metal. I get a headache just saying their name!). But I can't be bothered to actually keep track of all the new albums and songs. I would love to have a collection of all the songs I love and have access to them whenever I want. Wouldn't that be sweet? Oh well.

Yesterday I was surfing some blogs and I heard one of Cat Stevens' (now Yusuf Islam) oldies- and that was it. I am obssessed. It's EXACTLY the type of music I love. Soft with lyrics that gets you thinking.. And don't get me started on the guitar.....

So for the last 24 hours all I've been doing is listening to Cat Stevens' oldies and his recently released album "An Other Cup" (after a 30 year break) on YouTube.com.
Just now I was listening to the song "If you wanna sing out, sing out" (obviously, he hasn't heard me sing!)- It's beautiful.

And I'm in love! (not only with the music:P)

AND he's Muslim! (None of the hollywood stars are- I checked:P)

Like my MSN nickname clearly states, if only if only he wasn't 60 years old and with 5 kids... Ugh...

Oh- that and if he knew I existed of course:P