بكره العيد و بنعيد.. بندبح بقره السيد

I believe it was my grandpa who first taught me and my cousins this song. If I close my eyes for a bit, memories of many happy Eids in Amman will effortlessly surface.. I can almost hear us singing this song, giggling in amusement. I can still feel both my sister and my horror as we reached the "بندبح بنت العم" part (which is understandable since back then, were were the only "banat 3am" around!!).

I remember snuggling in the car together, trying to keep up with our grandma as she repeated the "Takbeer" all the way to the Eid prayer, but only succeeding in cutting her trail of thoughts, over and over. I remember her warm smile and glowing face..

I remember rushing to kiss all the grown-ups with a "kol saneh ou inta salem" and a look that plainly says "where's my 3eediyyeh?" :)

I remember my excitement as I basked in my newfound fortune. This lasted only as long as it took us to reach the toy shop. Fireworks, slimey icky balls, funny tricks and dolls- with such abundant tempatation, it's hardly a mystery our pockets are always empty on our way out.

Oh and changing into my new outfit! What excitement. I remember wanting to put it on days before the Eid, each day opening my closet to check that it's still there and still as pretty as I remember it to be.

Wow. It's been such a long time since I actually went and bought an "Eid outfit", specifically. But that's hardly the part of Eid I miss (afterall I am in the "land of a thousand malls", buying a new outfit is the least of my worries). What I do miss, terribly and painfully, is the spirit of Eid. When the whole family gets together, when the "kol saneh ou inta salem" is delivered not by phone, ecards and messages, but face to face. When the smile is true and touchable, not a mere ":)" in a window.

Seedo, I miss you to bits. I miss your laugh as you hear us singing the Eid songs. Tata, I wish that your angelic smile is the first thing I see on Eid. Sis, it's not Eid without you on the next bed as mom tries to wake us up for the 100th time for Eid prayer. Bro, something seems wrong when you're not around to "strike a deal" with me (aka stealing my 3eediyyeh you git:P). Auntie Sausan, my favorite auntie, nothing is the same without you. You add warmth, bliss and vigor just by being there. 3amo Munzer, there isn't a person in the world who's sweeter, and who makes me feel more special and loved. Auntie Basma, you always add a little something special. Amo Izzat, thank you for being so nice and sweet to me always.
My dear awesome cousins...
Nasser: Certainly is less competition on "Ka3ek" without you around;P But it's no fun that way. No fun at all!
Bisher: What's eid without your cute mischief?:)
Hussam: Who else will lead our kitten rescue expeditions?:)
Bassel: Who will make me laugh on Eid like you do?
Yassmeena: Sure feels good to know Dalia and I are no longer the only girls that qualify as "بنت العم" ;) I love acting silly with you:)

Mom and Dad.. it means the world to me that I'm lucky enough to be around you on Eid:) Without you, it wouldn't even be Eid.

Hmmm, considering that only 3 of the aforementioned will probably read this post, I'm not sure I should be pouring my heart out like that. Oh well, too late for that now! Blame this excessive mushiness on Eid, not me:)

Happy Eid to you all.. My awesome family.. wherever you are!
That's what I'm thankful for on this Eid, on this New Year, and on every passing day. If I were to handpick my family, I wouldn't possibly be able to choose a more awesome, loving and amazing family than you guys. You rock my world!

And to quote the movie "What a Girl Wants" that I'm watching right now: I love you a million red m&m's:)

My family. That's what this girl wants...